Being pregnant sucks. I really don't remember being such a mess with my son - and believe me, my circumstances were a whoooooole lot different then than they are now!
THEN: I was 18, married because I was naughty and got pregnant.
NOW: 28, married and THEEEEEEN got pregnant. Not naughty now....
THEN: My (then) husband didn't want to be a husband or a father.
NOW: My (now) husband is totally into the role, yo
THEN: I was married to an extroverted, womanizing, club-hopping, shop-lifting, wife-beating maniac.
NOW: Um.. he's like opposite of all that. Alhamdulillah.
THEN: Working in a chicken restaurant to make ends meet.
NOW: Teaching at an Islamic school to make ends meet. And of course for the sake of Allah. Plus the fact I can be all hijabified and Muslim and stuff without people arounding wondering why on earth I'm dressed like that. I can be me - weeeeee!
THEN: Morning sickness and other pregnancy related symptom were minimal.
NOW: I am a raging Hormonal Monster with roller coaster emotions and regurgitations.
THEN: No friends. At home all the time.
NOW: Oh... that part hasn't changed much.
Okay, okay... I have plenty of friends.... but my 'closeCLOSE'friends (at least 2) have since left Islam (One sighed "I need a break from being Muslim..." and I'm like... Uuuhhh... Islam isn't like a 9 to 5 job!) and are dealing with their 'issues' in less than favorable ways (Unhappy with your marriage, DATE OTHER PEOPLE!!!).
Kind of sad because I feelnow is when I needed them the most. My closest 'friend' hasn't called in a while. The last time we talked was when I thought I was miscarrying. She never called to check on me and never answered my calls or returned my messages. Now she is in town and 'too busy' to see me.
Husband is pretty cool. He has been fixing the breaks on my car this evening (really.. this man just pays for himself...). Married life is... well... that's another post.
Alhamdillah, he is a wonderful human being. Really the differences are petty. I just want to go out more, be more like 'newlyweds' and not like we're pushing our golden anniversary within 3 months of marriage. Which is how I'd explain my life now. I am the Hijabi Golden Girl.
Anyhoo... going to go and take a shower and get some rest..... Good night...